Back in Caracas, a coffee is an event. It’s a warm hug in a ceramic mug that you can actually hold with more than two fingers. When I landed in Split, I walked into a gorgeous stone-walled café, channeled my inner Mediterranean explorer, and confidently ordered ‘jednu kavu.’ What happened next was not just a service transaction; it was a cultural interrogation.
The Great Espresso Betrayal
The waiter brought a saucer. On that saucer was a cup so small it looked like it belonged in a dollhouse. Inside was a dark, viscous liquid that barely covered the bottom. I waited for him to bring the rest of the coffee. He didn’t. He just walked away, leaving me alone with my two sips of destiny.
“In Croatia, coffee isn’t a drink; it’s a three-hour philosophy session fueled by a single ounce of liquid gold.”
I looked around. Everyone else seemed perfectly content. They were laughing, gesturing wildly, and nursing these tiny thimbles for what seemed like an eternity. Meanwhile, I had finished mine before the waiter’s footsteps had faded.
The Art of ‘Kava’
I’ve since learned that the ‘kava’ culture here is sacred. You don’t just ‘grab’ a coffee. You sit. You exist. You watch the Riva. You let the world go by while your tiny cup grows cold, which apparently is the correct way to enjoy it.
The coffee itself is strong enough to wake the dead, which explains why Croatians can stretch a single espresso across an entire afternoon conversation. Back home, we’d have gone through a whole pot by then.
Lessons Learned
- Never ask for a “large coffee” — You will receive confused looks
- Bring a book — You’re going to be here a while
- Embrace the pace — This is meditation, not caffeine delivery
- The glass of water is important — It’s not a palate cleanser, it’s survival
I’m still adjusting. Some days I long for a Venezuelan “guayoyo” — that beautiful, endless flow of lighter coffee that keeps conversation going without the heart palpitations. But I’m learning to appreciate the Croatian way: intense, intentional, and inexplicably slow.
At least the view from the café is always worth the wait.